JIM DOOM: A few days ago, you left me a voicemail that said that “I just saw Iron Man, and not to spoil anything, but it’s my favorite movie of all time ever, and it’s the best thing that’s ever been created by mankind, even better than everything.”

Care to elaborate?

DOOM DELUISE: Certainly. Human beings, aka homo sapiens, evolved over many generations from monkeys. Since their development, they’ve come up with many amazing inventions, creations, works of art, etc. The wheel stands out as a good one, for example. The movie, “Iron Man,” starring Robert Downey Jr as Tony Stark, is, to date, the greatest accomplishment humans have achieved.

JIM DOOM: By “elaborate,” I meant something more like “Can you offer examples or explanations of what makes you think it’s so great,” as opposed to “Can you just restate ‘the best thing ever in the history of humans’ with different words?”

DOOM DELUISE: Oh, my bad. In that case, I think the movie is probably one of the most, essentially, fun experiences one could possibly ask for from a two-hour movie-going experience. The writing, the acting, the effects, they all come together to form a tight, hilarious, exciting, thrilling movie that, in my opinion, is super solid.

JIM DOOM: I’ll take that.

How much have you read Iron Man comics?

DOOM DELUISE: I read about two dozen in the early 90s. I’ve only since read Iron Man when he’s been involved with big crossovers. No, he’s never been one of my regularly read titles, if that’s what you’re asking. How much have you read?

JIM DOOM: Very very little. I don’t think I bought a single Iron Man comic before it was relaunched in the past couple years. I wonder if being relatively unfamiliar with his history helped me enjoy it more, because I was completely open to whatever backstory they wanted to give him.

I don’t think this movie could’ve worked without the context of the military - industrial complex and war profiteers being so present in modern culture.

They managed to do a great job of making Iron Man a product of the story rather than creating some contrived situation to justify having a superhero fight bad guys.

And I think the absolute best thing about this movie, one of the biggest failings of most superhero movies, is that this film was not ashamed to be a superhero movie. There was no self-deprecatory, “Hey, we’re making a COMIC BOOK movie — isn’t this cute?” nudge-nudge wink-wink self-neutering that happens in so many comic book movies.

All of the humor came naturally through well-defined characters and never at the expense of the story.

I think that, more than anything, allowed this movie to work.

It gave the viewers permission to get emotionally invested in what was happening.

DOOM DELUISE: Most definitely. It also deftly was able to side-step another one of the biggest problems that has plagued previous comic book movies: It never took itself too seriously. When the chips were on the table, and the villain wanted Stark dead, we saw some emotions coming through, but, otherwise, you didn’t have very many scenes of Tony Stark brooding or staring off into the night sky while contemplating his place in the world.

Here, he’s a man of action, and when shit starts going down, he steps up his efforts to stop it.

JIM DOOM: I like that they not only got good actors for this, but they let them act. I think some of the best scenes in the movie were when Robert Downey Jr and Gwyneth Paltrow were just standing a few feet from each other and conversing.

DOOM DELUISE: I agree. And I think that Jeff Bridges owned his role as the Iron Monger.

That scene where his top scientist is telling him that they just don’t have the technology to create this gizmo, and he just screams, “Tony Stark built this in a cave using a bucket of scraps!” I was blown away.

JIM DOOM: Was there anything you didn’t like?

DOOM DELUISE: No.
(more…)

I hate when comics cost $3.99.

I especially hate when I buy a $3.99 comic and I feel like I have no choice (within the realm of relative comic reading autonomy). I picked up Giant-Size Avengers / Invaders #1 because I was in a hurry at the comic shop and I didn’t look closely and thought I was buying the first issue of the upcoming 12-part series.

WRONG! Had I looked closer, I would’ve realized I was buying a collection of reprinted Avengers and Invaders stories from the ’60s and ’70s!! And for the most part, I hate comic stories from the ’60s and ’70s, especially thanks to the past few years, in which comics creators have done their best to try to convince the readers that the ’60s and ’70s were something other than hokey crap that was suited only for the seven year olds that bought it!

But as mad as I was at myself for buying the stupid thing, I was even madder at this inanimate heap of centrally stapled 4-color nonsense, and I was not about to let it have victory over me. I was going to read every page, no matter how much I hated it.

Man, it was awesome. The first story, “Endgame!” was from Avengers #71. In that issue, Kang the Conqueror and The Grand-Master are having some kind of 41st century battle by proxy. If Kang wins, he receives mastery over life and death; if The Grand-Master wins, he gets Earth. So Kang somewhat unwittingly plays the role of Earth’s protector, as it’s up to him to choose wisely and ensure victory for himself and the planet.

This issue is included because Kang chooses The Avengers and The Grand-Master chooses the Invaders, setting up what was probably the first clash between the two teams. Most of the action and all of the dialog in this issue is cheesy, but what makes that work is that this battle ends up being the delivery for a moral, as Kang becomes a tragic character who ends up giving up everything he wants in attempt at revenge. The unrealistically larger-than-life behavior of the characters ends up being more than tolerable because of the fact that this is little more than a fable, and you can totally see how a pre-teen would’ve been blown away by this issue and likely read it over and over.
(more…)

Ultimate X-Men
Read from #1 (2001) to #93 (2008)

It’s been a long time since Ultimate X-Men has been good. Since Robert Kirkman took over from Brian K. Vaughan a few years ago, the quality of the book has greatly suffered. And that’s coming from a Kirkman-apologist.

Kirkman had a few things going against him, though. He was originally just supposed to fill in while Bryan Singer got his shit together and wrote his Ultimate X-Men story. When Singer crapped out and Kirkman was given “ongoing” status, he was saddled with art teams that changed nearly every issue. See, I told you I was an apologist.

Ultimate X-Men by Robert Kirkman has not been very good, but I kept buying out of a love for Kirkman’s other work and because Ultimate X-Men was just one of those comics I’d always buy out of habit.

Now Kirkman is leaving the title. He’s being replaced by one of the writers from Heroes, a show whose quality has never been discussed on doomkopf.com as far as I can remember. Last fall before the writer’s strike, I realized that I didn’t like Heroes and was watching it out of habit and out of a loyalty to the genre. Sort of like how I don’t like Ultimate X-Men and only buy it out of habit and loyalty to Kirkman. Funny how that worked out, huh?

Dropping Ultimate X-Men also means that I’m probably not ever going to buy another Ultimate comic. I couldn’t stand Ultimate Spider-Man past the first issue. Ultimate Fantastic Four got really boring when Mike Carey took over. And Jeph Loeb and Joe Madureira ruined The Ultimates. I bought Ultimate Six, Ultimate War, Ultimate X4, and the Ultimate Galactus trilogy. But Marvel’s never going to get another Ultimate dollar out of me.

Weird…I’ve never dropped an entire universe before.

(more…)

How utterly fitting. In a series where absolutely nothing of importance happened over the course of fifty tedious issues, it is only fitting that the finale is similarly devoid of any points of interest.

Still, the series accomplished what it set out to accomplish, I suppose. They killed all of the New Gods, and they established the fact that there are fifty-two Monitors watching over each of the fifty-two universes of the Multiverse. They also made it so that Brother Eye is in hiding, with only one OMAC left at his disposal, which is a far cry from before the series, when Brother Eye was in hiding, with only one OMAC at his disposal. They also turned “Mary Damn Marvel” evil and changed Jason Todd from the ruthless, loner vigilante he used to be into the all-new and improved ruthless, loner vigilante that he is now. Holly Robinson and Harley Quinn and the Pied Piper were also dealt with; they went from being lost and purposeless to being…uh, purposeless and lost. Plus, some supervillains were rounded up and shipped off-world. Oh, and some universes died and were reborn.

Why have I been so critical of this series, then? Simple. The New Gods dying wasn’t really covered here; it had its own mini-series for that. The Monitors were established in Brave New World. Salvation Run took care of the missing supervillains story, and the Challengers never really did anything of note. Well, unless you count going from universe to universe for no reason, fighting big bug monsters, eventually heading to Apokolips, leaving, watching a dead but reborn earth die again, and then going home as “something of note.” Because if that’s the case, well, yeah, sure, I guess they did something. Hit the jump. (more…)

Sweet, merciful crap, it’s almost over.

Let me ask you an old question: If a tree falls in the woods, and nobody’s around to hear it, does it still make a sound? Now let me twist that question just a tad: If a direct Countdown tie-in features a major plot point months in advance to an issue of Countdown, do you think Countdown will acknowledge it or realize it happened? Let me ask it differently: Does the Pope shit on Countdown in the woods?

I’d usually pause at this point and say that we need to catch up to whatever happened in this issue, or whatever they’re passing off as happening in this issue, but I don’t know if you guys will be able to keep up this week. Take a deep breath to focus all of your energies on this following summation, so that you don’t have to re-read it. It may be worth re-reading; don’t get me wrong. That’s a judgment call that you’re going to have to make on your own, but here it is:

Jimmy Olsen, in the form of a giant-sized turtle, wrestles a giant-sized Darkseid, until a miniature-sized Ray Palmer destroys the soul catcher that was inside Jimmy (the one that has been housing all the souls/powers of the dead New Gods), after which point a Boom Tube opens up nearby, from which a non-dead Orion (who died in DONG #6), comes out to confront and eventually kill a now non-giant Darkseid. And then Orion also dies.

Let me sit here while that sinks in for a second.

Ladies and gentlemen, this is your second to last issue of Countdown to Final Crisis.

What was all of that talk, back in DONG #6, where Scott Free says how he felt Orion’s death through the Source Wall, something he couldn’t sense with the other dead New Gods, since Orion’s soul wasn’t stolen; rather, he died and returned to the Source, leaving only his helmet behind. Darkseid felt it too, reaching out from across the span of space, waxing poetic about how their joined story has finally ended. And then, later, at the end of the next issue, Darkseid is confronted by the now fully-reformed Source, at which point the Source notes that Darkseid has pulled something unexpected for their final clash in the upcoming conclusion to the DONG miniseries.

I mean, really, what was all of that? Somebody answer me, goddamnit. No explanation is given and none can be.

Here’s my prediction/prayer-list for the finale next week: Every last one of these characters is killed off, after which every writer and artist involved on this project resigns and goes off to sell auto-insurance somewhere far away.

There are three things I’ve learned in the past twenty-four hours. First, you can get across the border from Panama to Costa Rica with no outbound ticket documentation by giving the border guard a five dollar bill. Second, when a boat driver tells you he’s going to pick you up at a certain time, that’s not taking into account his forty-five minute-long coffee break. Third, not even several weeks in a sunny paradise can make me any more amiable toward Countdown to Final Crisis, the single worst comic book I’ve ever read from start to (almost) finish.

I’m still in Central America, so, off the bat, my apologies for the delayed recap. But, really, what have I missed since we last got caught up? The Great Disaster has come and gone, the Challengers returned to our Earth, and Mary Marvel got a whole lot sexier. Thankfully, Fin Fang Doom picked up the slack last week and I didn’t have to write three weeks worth of recaps; I think just this one will be plenty for now.

So, last Wednesday, Countdown. Three weeks, three issues left. What happened? I’ll give you three guesses, and the first two don’t count.

Nothing happened. Nothing ever happens. Oh, and, does everybody fully understand that The Great Disaster had ABSOLUTELY NO IMPACT ON ANYTHING? (more…)

Some twenty months after “Brave New World,” the Trials of Shazam mini-series has finally concluded, leaving in its wake a new status quo for the Marvel Family, repleat with name changes, costume changes, and even a few changes in the core members. Oh, and the source of their powers has kind of changed too, I think. Depends on who you ask, I suppose.

Way back when this mini-series began, in September of 2006, I came right out and said that Trials of Shazam was, “my new favorite comic book.” Some claimed I was riding some sort of Hyperbole Train, whatever that means, but I stand by the claim. Throughout this series, the art has been nothing short of spectacular, and the characters and actions have been genuinely engaging. Sure, the delays friggin’ tanked a lot of the momentum; however, I’m certain that many will agree, for whatever reason, that it would probably read a lot better in one sitting.

With that aside, let’s forget about the merits of the story itself for a little bit and talk about what, exactly, it has established within the world of magic in the DCU. (more…)

SPOILER ALERT!! If you haven’t read The Walking Dead #48 yet, you’re better off just checking out Mary Marvel’s rack. I wouldn’t want to ruin anything for you.

Holy frak. Robert Kirkman was not kidding when he named the latest storyline in The Walking Dead “No One Is Safe.” I don’t remember the last time the direction of a book was altered so drastically in such a short period of time. DC might kill off Batman and Marvel might retcon the Peter/MJ marriage, but we all know when those stories have run their course, everything will be back to the way it always has been. But the same can’t be said for The Walking Dead.

The only status quo in TWD is that there is no status quo.

The Walking Dead #46 featuring the beheading of Tyrese, the second male lead in the series.

The Walking Dead #47 including the death of avuncular convict Axel.

But that was all small potatoes compared to what happened in The Walking Dead #48. (more…)

In case anyone was wondering, yes, Mary Marvel does in fact have boobs. See? They’re right up there. Nice and big, so you can really get a sense of how her boobs define her character. Also of note: Mary’s left boob, the logical thinking one, is evil, while her right bood, the creative one, is good. Now that all of the boob-related concerns have been addressed, we can get down to business. (more…)

It’s the final installment of our 4-Part Book of Doom series this week, reviewing four new issues that began four new arcs in their respective titles.

Ms. Marvel #25 followed up on last month’s revelation by Tony Stark that Carol Danvers - or at least a Carol Danvers was a Skrull. We can see from this issue, however, that there is also a Carol Danvers that isn’t a Skrull.

She was one of my first guesses as to who was a Skrull, based on little dialogue things from earlier issues of New Avengers and Mighty Avengers. But I’m kind of getting the hint that Secret Invasion will be full of red herrings.

The Colossus-Skrull made his first appearance in the New Avengers: Illuminati issue that revealed Black Bolt to be a Skrull. I’m still not sure if Colossus is real, Colossus is a Skrull, there’s a real Colossus and a Skrull Colossus, or if this is just another red herring since we all know that Colossus was dead for a while.

There wasn’t a whole lot to this issue, and definitely nothing worth spending $3.99 on. The writing was just kind of stiff, and I get the feeling that Brian Reed doesn’t know what it’s like to have the internal monologue of a woman. I don’t either, but I just doubt that it’s full of clichés like thinking about ice cream. Then again, maybe it is. I suppose I shouldn’t judge based on the authenticity — just on the fact that it felt cheesy and contrived.

I shouldn’t say there wasn’t a lot to this issue. Her boyfriend got killed. And maybe he’s a Kree. And maybe her agent is a Skrull. There is definitely more going on here, and regular readers of Ms. Marvel probably got a lot more out of this than I did. But as far as attracting a new reader, as this week’s 4-Part Book of Doom experiment was sort of based around doing, since it’s all about new arcs and whatnot, I don’t think I was interested enough to buy another issue. Maybe if it’s a slow week. But I have a feeling I’ll be more than happy to get my Ms. Marvel dose in Mighty Avengers. (more…)